Reasons why I am kind of a horrible person

4) I'm incredibly selfish. This may seem like an odd thing for someone who spends so much time volunteering to say, but it's true. I volunteer when there is something in it for me. Volunteering for town stuff is fun for me because I meet people, make good connections, do stuff that could potentially benefit my career down the road, and help plan and attend events. At the aquarium I get to occasionally feed whales and play with sea lions. Every minute I give, I gain something I consider worthwhile in return.

3) I have, on occasion, successfully faked a conversation I knew nothing about. I consider the most grave lie I have ever told to be book-related. I have indicated that I may have read and even discussed - at length - a certain book that I have never actually read (it is only one book, and Doyle, Amanda - I have NOT pretended to have read this book in a conversation with you). In fact, I've never actually claimed to have read it, per se; I have just discussed it as if I have, and this makes me officially kind of a liar.

2) I eat certain very inhumane food products. I understand animal cruelty. I give money to the ASPCA and the Humane Society. I try to buy free-range, grass-fed, small-farm meat from local farmer's markets. But you know, every once in awhile I see veal something or the other or foi gras on a menu - neither of which have any remotely humane characteristics about them - and I just can't resist ordering. I hate myself when I say the words, but honestly, I forget how much when I take the first bite.

1) I am not really interested in anyone's baby. I try. Really, I do. (Okay, I don't try that hard.) I am just not interested in babies. They are all the same to me. Don't take it personally; I do not mean it to be insulting. But I'm just not into it and can only feign interest for so long.

Well, that was rather cathartic. If I was a good Catholic I would go to confession rather than blog it, but that's a list I'm not going to make right now.